Assalamu Alaikum (Peace be upon you),
This time we Pass the Lantern right here to Dallas, Texas USA! I am so happy to share with all of you the traditions and spirit of Ramadan and Eid, here in the United States...or at least here in Texas! Whats even more exciting is that I will also be sharing with you a Ramadan experience from the aspect of non-Muslim Americans, who were thrilled to share their "fasting" stories with us!
This year, Ramadan 2011 had some pretty distinct timing, as it began on August 1, 2011 and ended with Eid on Aug 30th, 2011. Here in Dallas, the Muslim community follows the Islamic timings according to the Islamic Society of North America. This is how we get the exact dates and fasting times with which we follow during Ramadan. Our local mosque, Islamic Association of North Texas, hosts all kinds of amazing events and activities during Ramadan! They even publish a convenient Ramadan fasting calendar for Muslims to use, so that we can keep up with proper times for suhoor, breaking our fast, and praying Tarweeh prayers each night. You can check out the Ramadan prayer and activities here. 
IANT helps keep Ramadan quite organized, members can follow that link and find out who will be leading the Tarweeh prayer each night, how long that Brother has been a Hafiz of the Quran, and even find out about additional khutbas, or lectures, that will be scheduled that evening. Twitter and Facebook are also used, to let members know ahead of time which section of the Quran will be recited that night during prayers, so that others can follow along! Iftars are also hosted every weekend at the mosque and the busy Tarweeh prayers are kept well organized with assistance from security and local police to aid in the over flow of traffic inside and outside the mosque! This is a necessity because in Dallas, hundreds and hundreds of local Muslims gather each and every night to pray.
At our home, we really look forward to Ramadan! This year, we decorated our home with glittery gold Islamic crescents and bright twinkling Islamic crescent lights! We also have a basket that says "Ramadan Kareem" on it and it's full of candy, which the kids (and everyone else) loves when they come over for iftar. For me, it's important for Ramadan to really feel like a holiday, since I am a convert to Islam. I really wanted guests of our home to know as soon as they walked in that we were celebrating a special time of the year. You can find Ramadan decorations at Noorart and Eidway websites! We found ours while on our recent trip to Amman, Jordan, so that's an option too if your in the neighborhood, LOL.
When it's time for suhoor, we are always excited the first few weeks of Ramadan to wake up and have some breakfast! Right now at our home, it's just me and Hassan, so we wake up together and make some boiled eggs (his fav), and juice and water and I usually have a big bowl of whole grain cereal with some cut-up fruit. While we are eating, an application on my computer will play the voice of an old Muslim man, walking through an ancient Islamic village, beating his drum and calling out in Arabic for everyone to wake up for suhoor! It's so cute and really makes the early morning breakfast a little more fun. We then pray Fajr together and usually will sleep a little before time to start the work day!Each year we enjoy hosting close friends for iftar, and we love visiting each other. There are so many nights that we will get invited to share an iftar at friends or families homes and we try to invite them back, the same. In Dallas, we break our fast with plump juicy dates, most are imported from Saudi Arabia (YUM). Then, we have a small bowl of soup and small salad. Afterward we will stop and all pray Magrib prayer together. Then it's time for the main course, then Tarweeh prayers.
At my home, if I invite Hassan's Jordanian family for iftar, usually I will make a large roasted rosemary leg of lamb with roasted potatoes and carrots in the broth! On the side we will have a pasta salad and my hubby will make the best kabseh dish ever. He's the "Rice King", the title is not official though, LOL. We also serve up some yummy garlic cheese bread and a delish dessert with tea awaits everyone when they return from praying Tarweeh together at the mosque. For the kids, I make them their own individual personal cheese pita pizza's, it's their favorite and shows them they are special! Each year, I also prepare a Ramadan craft for the kids to create together. This year they colored Islamic mosaic designs for the kids to take home and decorate with, so beautiful! You can download your own Muslim coloring pages here.For the past few years, we have invited a few of Hassan's co-workers, at World Affairs Council, DFW, to fast for one day and then to break their fast with us in our home. It's always been something important to us, to share Ramadan with non-Muslims, and Hassan's co-workers really enjoy being included. This year, Hassan's boss, Jim Falk-President of WAC, suggested that the whole office be invited to fast and before you know it, the owner of a local halal restaurant offered to donate the iftar for that evening! I am so excited to share photographs and a few video clips from that special night with you!
We first prepared a friendly Ramadan email that was sent out to all the staff, highlighting the beauty and tradition of Ramadan and fasting, to give the participants a background. I even included some helpful "tips", like when you hit that afternoon fasting wall and you MUST have a coffee...just remind yourself of all the children in Somalia who are dying for only a drink of water. We also made sure to email positive motivation to participants the day of fasting, and tried to give a feeling of pride in having strong self-discipline.
The day was over and the sun was about to set, probably not quick enough for the brave few who made it through the fasting adventure. We all met at the beautiful home of Br. Ahmed, who owns an amazing (and favorite) halal Moroccan restaurant called, Kasbah! In his home he had a beautiful Moroccan inspired room for all of us to gather in, and a local religious leader was present to give a small speech on the beauties of Ramadan. The staff was surprised to learn all of the details involved in fasting, such as the fact that it is not seen as a burden and is pardoned from those who cannot partake in it. Shortly after it was time to break our fast with ice cold milk and juicy dates, and then on to delicious soup and warm bread! After the first course we all dined on the best Moroccan feast in Texas!
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| WAC staff along with Nicole, Natsiria, and Hassan |
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| Nicole with Jennifer and Natsiria |
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| Hassan, Jim Falk and WAC staff members |
If you would like to visit the amazing Moroccan restaurant that provided the feast for our iftar that night please see their information below:
Kasbah Grill
2851 Esters Rd
Irving, TX 75062
Irving, TX 75062
www.kasbahcuisine.com
If you would like to learn more about the World Affairs Council, DFW, then please visit the link below:
Hassan and I would both like to wish you and your families an amazing Eid Mubarak, 2011. We have some special news to share with you all! You might have noticed some extra weight on me in the video! God has blessed us with a baby boy, due this winter, God willing. We thank God everyday for his blessing and are so excited to become parents soon! Eid Mubarak!!!
I scored a few huge jobs shooting celebrity events for Ghost Bar, inside the infamous W Hotel in Dallas. Only the most beautiful and successful people partied at this place. I shot everyone from Justin Timberlake to Owen Wilson and Kate Hudson, and lots of other sports and pop stars that graced our doors.
With this job came lots of other restaurant openings, and every other main street night club had me shooting their private parties. My work then went into all the Dallas magazines, sometimes even in People and Paper City. I got to hang out with publicists from Vogue and worked with the best in the media business. It was simple and glamorous and along came with it lots of glam friends. I could walk into any party and it seemed I couldn't go anywhere at night without spotting friends.
I even had to look the part while working. I had to wear sexy clothes, loads of makeup, and "fohawk" style hair — it was popular at the time. I often found that I had fans. People actually came up and wanted to have their picture with me, on their own cameras. Later I would see it posted on Myspace or Facebook. I partied, and drank, and only cared about one person: me.
Deep down inside though, this life and the people in it started to wear down on my soul. It's a wicked life. I remember standing next to Justin Timberlake and all the flashes from the crowd going off, and we could barely see five feet in front of us. I only took about three shots of him, so I wouldn't get fired and then I slid my lens to the side. I couldn't do it more. It felt horrible all these people screaming, flashing, body guards around him, managers yelling — and this was after he had finished a three-hour concert. What kind of life was that?
I felt dirty that I was part of the reason he couldn't have a normal life. I started wondering what was so great about my life, what was I doing to better anything around me. Nothing, just shooting pictures of people partying and drinking and wow, "Here is my contribution America. I'm here to make the world a more materialistic and vain place!" Not exactly something that would make my grandmother proud.
So here it came, the overwhelming sensation of doubt about who I was and what I was doing with my life. I couldn't sleep. I began having nightmares with people screaming out to help them. I also couldn't escape the thought of the most important question that I had ever asked myself, "What will you say when you must explain your life to God?" OMG, what do you say, "Umm sorry God I am too busy drinking and hanging out with cool people to think about You or to help others."
This is definitely a defining moment in my life where I knew it was time for some changes. I talked with friends about what I was feeling. They tried so hard to help. One friend recommended that I watch a few lectures on YouTube. One of which from a guy named Yusuf Estes, a Muslim convert who used to be a Christian pastor. The best part was he was from Texas! I watched the lectures and when I got to his I heard a bearded man explain everything I was going through right to me as though he was reading my mind.
He told the story of his conversion to Islam from Christianity. Said he needed a greater purpose in life, a better reason to wake up in the morning. Oh how nice this sounded to me. To wake up without thinking, "What did I do last night, and how did I get home alive?"
I became obsessed with learning more about his religion. I would come home from shooting around 2:30 a.m. and get online till the sun came up. It was so relieving to listen to other converts too! Holy cow I found some help! Of course when studying and believing in this religion, you start to look at yourself differently. It's like you see yourself from outside your body!
I remember a friend of mine (who is now my husband) said to me, "Who is it that thinks your so glamorous and cool? What kind of people are they. They are just like you only caring about themselves and living for nothing better." Ouch, those words drove straight through me. He became my biggest supporter in my transition.
I remember one day I wanted to start going to the New Muslim classes at the local masjid and I went into my huge closet to find something suitable to wear. Ha! Good luck! This day I went crazy I think. I teared up as I thrashed through the hangers of sexy tops and tight jeans and pants — not one single thing that I could wear to a holy place. Most of the tops had to be taped on to avoid the loose fabric from exposing your chest! I began crying at myself. What kind of girl was I!
I tore through the clothes, throwing them behind me in a huge pile of slinky embarrassment. When I was done there was only a small rack of barely modest things left. I couldn't afford to replace them all so I slowly began the process of a new wardrobe. I started with looser pants, shirts with long sleeves, modest shoes instead of stilettos, and a low pony tail became my daily routine. Then it went from there, and slowly but surely God carved his way through my black heart and planted Himself deeply inside.
I said my Shahada in April of 2007 in the office of Dr. Yusuf Kavacki, the father of Elif Kavacki. My later husband Hassan was there supporting me, as well as a few new girlfriends I had made from the New Muslim classes. I have a slew of new friends now, who follow the same lifestyle as me. I didn't get rid of any of my old friends, but if your not down for meeting people at the bar, then they tend to stop calling as much, until it's just never at all. No problem for me. I am busy as I ever was and happily married with a wonderful family of in-laws not far away.
I asked Hassan if I could visit Jordan; he is from Amman and his parents and siblings live there. His family was so happy to have me. Muslims have the best sense of family and welcome guests as if they are blood. I stayed with his Mom and Dad for a month. I started wearing the hijab full-time there, it made being out in public easier for me, less men harassing you and people really respect you more. Wow, people respecting me for the way I dress and carry myself in public, that was a new and wonderful feeling.
When I came back to Dallas, I couldn't take off the scarf. I just couldn't stand the thought of going back to being just another "piece of meat" for men to glare at. I didn't want to go back to competing with women based on whose boobs look bigger, and what brand are you wearing and are you sexy enough to be my friend. No more of this life for me. I wanted to be free from those chains and wearing the hijab was the only answer for this. I wore it proud, wore it with style, and actually more men than ever in my life opened doors for me and showed me respect.
One day a man in his 40's came up to me at a store and said, "Where did you get these clothes, you look so classy and stylish. I wish my wife would start dressing this way." Why wouldn't men love this. They have a beautiful wife who shows her skin only to him and in public she covers demanding respect for herself and her religion with every public appearance she makes. I am currently working on designing new headpieces for hijab-wearing women to wear. Soon, Inshallah, I will have the first set completed.
I still do photography, but I keep it clean, you know. I don't shoot clubs or crazy parties anymore. I stick with charity functions, fundraisers, and my newly started wedding and bridal photography is going quite well. I also take part in MAS (Muslim American Society) and WCTI (Woman Converts to Islam). I speak sometimes to schools about Islam, and even to Muslim schools to the younger girls, I try to tell them to stay away from the wrong kind of life. I tell them from experience that it gets you nowhere, a vicious lonely circle where everyone is lonely and rich and it never gets any better.
I have a huge following on Myspace, thanks to the YouTube interview done on me. I use the page on Myspace to reach out to other "party girls" and show them that you can escape that life. Even if you don't wanna become a Muslim, just clean up your life and you will change forever for the best. Having God in your life is the best therapy you could ever hope for, and it's free!
I also love working with Sr. Elif Kavacki. She is a great woman and really trying to open doors for Muslim women everywhere. I am happily married, and we are hoping one day Allah will bless us with an addition to our new little family. My husband and I enjoy living in downtown and keeping each other close to our religion. We frequent trips to the masjid and enjoy nights with friends for dinner. We have picnics by the lake and watch the sunset, and attend a lot of functions with his career. This replaced all the late-night parties and people who don't really care about you. I think it's a pretty good trade, Hamidillah.